The Beginning and The End

I'm not sure why I am back here.

It could be because today is the beginning of my no-social-media life and I had no where to go to anymore. Or maybe it's just because it's the end of a very good person's life.

Therefore, I want to seek solace here.

Muhaimin's mom died today.

The closest experience I had on death was my grandfather whom, to be honest, I wasn't very close to. His death didn't really makes me feel anything. I thought back then, it was because my perception of death was just a simple transition of life from Earth to the Afterlife. It's not something you should be very sad about. Most of them are living happily waiting their big entrance to the Heaven.

But today, I doubt my low key reaction was because of that rational and instead the reason was simply that I didn't know my grandfather very well.

But Muhaimin's mother? I know her. More than my own grandfather.
So I'm feeling this tingles and sorrow hovering over me right now. This is the first time I feel sad of someone's death.
I only know her for a week two or so but yet, it was still a meaningful one.

When I was really close to Muhaimin in the early years, before I even met her, he told me about how his mom annoys him by being overprotective and what not. As if he is being over-watched too much and he doesn't have enough freedom. The typical 'only child' story that I've been hearing a lot.

But then, we had stuff going on and I had to live in his house for around two weeks. I was so blessed to meet her in real life. She was an amazing, energetic and caring mother. I saw how they both interacted. Despite whatever he said to me, I doubt that annoyance could ever beat the love and bond they shared. Muhaimin was so childish and helpless with his mother around and his mother? She was so motherly and wasn't shy to show it out.

There was something so special and big about their relationship. He was her only son and so was she to him.

They only got each other (sort of). And now her death, leaving him alone (sort of), how in the hell world will he have the strength to do that?

I'm now trembling while writing this.

Wallahi, I can't imagine what Muhaimin must have been through right now.

I am here. The WTees are here. But to compensate? We can never.
But we are here. I just hope that he knows that.

May Allah ease her.
May Allah ease him.


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